Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Who am I Cybil?

Do you remember that old movie about the woman with multiple personalities? I never saw the whole thing but she was pretty crazy, bonkers, coo-coo for cocoa puffs if ya know what I mean. I think I may be a little wacky too.

Yesterday was a rough day. It was one of those days where I wanted to QUIT. Throw my hands up in the air and quit being a mom, let a lone a stay at home mom. We had to take superman to the pediatric optomologist. We can't go to just any old eye doctor nooooo. They have to specialize in preemie eyes. There is only ONE in the Tampa Bay area. TB has a population of over TWO million people so to get in to see her is tough. Her office is 45 minutes away. This was our ordeal:

Wake sleeping toddler up from nap. Waking sleeping toddler is like waking a sleeping bear.
Drive 45 minutes. Play "On top of Spaghetti" four times. (His favorite song)
Wait in office for 45 minutes. Feed crackers to restless child, read books and play with car.
Pick up books, crackers and car from the floor multiple times.
Apologize to other patrons for screaming child.
Finally get into room and nurse puts eye drops to dilate panic stricken child's eyes.
Wait another 20 minutes. In the mean time...
Walk fussy child around shady areas of parking lot trying to avoid sunlight. We live in FL hello!
Pick tantrum throwing child up from parking lot put into stroller.
Feed banana. Pick banana up from pavement.
Push stroller around in circle inside office waiting room 38 times.
Listen to my hunger pains.
Finally get in to see Dr. ...
Remove child's hands from expensive equipment repeatedly. Over. And Over.
Dr. looks into child's eyes, he is fine. Must return in six months.
Ignore my hunger pains.
Sit in rush hour traffic for one hour.
Play "On top of Spaghetti" 13 times on ride home and sing along.
Praise Jesus when we pull into driveway.

After this nightmare superman's molars start to peak through his pink gums turning him into grumpy stinkerpants for the rest of the evening. We listened to whining and crying the majority of our night. Tylenol does not work! Damn that Tylenol! One of the worst feelings is not being able to help an upset child. I reached my breaking point. This particular day was the straw that broke the camel's back. I deal with his frustration and pour myself a heaping cup of patience on a daily basis. That's what parents do.

At one point, I look to my husband and say, "I just can't do this anymore. No, FOR REAL! Being a mom, the whole stay at home mommy thing. It is just not for me. I quit." And I was serious. Where is the nearest day care center? When does school start? If the nearest exit is located behind me I'm turning around. Take me out coach I don't like this game. It's days like this that are good for population control.

Today is another story. Superman was happy and in turn so was I. His smile lit up the room multiple times. He was so cute in the bathtub tonight splashing around that I actually thought of having another child. For a mere second I thought, "Another bambino sure would be fun." It's days like this that keep the human species going.

See, I'm nutty. Crazy. Insane. I tol ya so. I don't know either of these women. How can I go from one extreme to another so quickly? Medication, do they make medication for this? I'd like some please.

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